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October 29, 2009

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Kevin

First, your post title made me go "HA!" out loud. Loudly.

Second, that anon. response also made me go HA! out loud, but not as loudly.

Now, my real issue: Perez and his outing of this Bomer guy, who I have only just started hearing about.

I'm assuming he's not a bad guy, doesn't spew homophobic bullshit at his costars, doesn't support DOMA, DADT or whatever. And yet, Perez feels compelled to out him.

Mario makes me sick.

Oh, and there's no way that's a 'drunk dare.' Look at the hand placement of both men. One on face, the other inside t-shirt? That's no dare. Drunk? Who can say?

Matthew Rettenmund

Kevin: I think the point is that Perez was saying the guy WAS out. Though I'm not sure if that's true, he appears to have thought so.

But no matter; I'm behind outing of public figures. If writing about someone's sex life is fair game when they're straight, it's fair game when they're gay. And the argument that being gay could hurt their careers doesn't work because career-hurting info on non-gay stars is openly disseminated all the time (beating your girlfriend, cheating on your wife, dangling your baby over a balcony, being spotted at a DUI arrest, etc.).

Ventura

who cares he's HOT!!!

ed3socal

Regardless of his orientation, he's a pretty good actor and VERY good looking.

S.

I'd like to ditty Ventura's comment, too.

Joseph

If you take a look at the discussion of his Wikipedia entry, there's a claim that he admitted being gay in an interview with Nylon magazine in early 2007. I've never read Nylon and have no way of confirming that, and no specific issue number was cited.

forgetmenot

Honestly the show would have lost me after ten minutes were it not for two things: Mssr. Boner. Er, I mean Bomer -- and for God's sake, Diahann Carroll! She is just pitch perfect, and he is pup perfect. So I watch.

Stuart

The issue with Perez and his ilk is that the days of the celluloid closet are over - there is always going to be lowlife out there who will out people, and it only takes one person. Every man and his dog has a blog and a mobile with a camera, the barrier to entry is so low that anyone can do it.

I couldn't disagree more strongly with outing people - I understand that they are celebrities but they are still people, and outing someone is a shitty thing to do to them - regardless of whether you think they 'deserve' it or not.

We'd all love it not to matter, but it *does* still matter - quite aside from the invasion of privacy, it can lose them work, and it forces them into the uncomfortable position of publicly defending their sexuality (whatever that might be) - I don't want people associating being gay with someone squirming in shame under the glare of the camera flash. How is that going to help any person come out? I'd much rather that people concentrate on supporting people who come out of their own free will - that is a positive example that helps everyone.

Kevin

"If writing about someone's sex life is fair game when they're straight, it's fair game when they're gay."

and in an ideal world, yes, you are 1000% right. but until "being gay" isn't quite so sensational to the bloggers and tabloids, then it is still an issue of privacy. granted, the majority of people would probably say, "so what?" finding out someone is gay, but as long as there is a closet to come out of, then it should be the individual's choice, not Mario's.

if we go along with the assumption that Bomer is already out, well then, I've just wasted everybody's time. :)

John

also in the evidence locker? Zach Quinto (another basically out but not quite 'mo) recently tweeted that Bomer was a "dear friend" (do any straight guys say "dear" in regards to their friends?) and encouraged peeps to watch White Collar. Is it a smoking gun? No. But birds of a feather.

titus

saw white collar last weekend. wiki-ed him on saturday. under personal was just one line. read this last night. know there are several lines. dealing with his friendship and sexuality.... ah breaking news.

Matthew Rettenmund

Stuart & Kevin: Respectfully, I strongly disagree. For one thing, you both ignored the central premise of my argument for why outing is ethical—if you're going to argue that being gay can cost them work, etc., then you can't argue that reporting on stars' DUIs, bad break-ups, nasty cell calls to their kids, violent streaks, hetero infidelities and other shortcomings would not cost them work. Therefore, you should be very upset about ALL gossip about ALL stars' personal lives, with no limitations.

To be strictly upset about "outing" (which should be rebranded as "telling the truth") reinforces the idea that being gay is especially bad. Or, if you want to look at it another way, it gives gay people special rights, something our enemies have always falsely argued we want.

Kevin, how can we tell when being gay isn't quite so sensational, and what is helping famous, successful actors stay in the closet forever doing to help nudge the unsensationalism along?

John: I like the way your mind works. It's not a smoking gun but I bet that sucker is loaded.

Kevin

Oops, I meant to clarify that in that last comment: I actually don't think being gay can cost anyone work.

One could say that forcing someone to tell the truth also implies that they're bad.

I had my choice taken away almost 20 years ago and it still gets under my skin today. Not because I was doing anything bad, but because I wasn't ready.

TomTom

I kind of lean towards not outing people...we all need to do this on our own time. But man, I gotta tell you, that is one intense kiss.

Marcus

Matthew, a few bloggers have told me that lawyers send ceast and desist regarding photos of certain celebrities in various, uh, circumstances, is that what happen here with Bomer's make-out photos?

I hope not.

Matthew Rettenmund

Marcus: I didn't get a cease-and-desist, I was just asked politely. (Frankly, I don't see how a legal challenge could prevail in this case.)

jeff reichenbacher

Hey, I love your site but I'm disappointed by the deletion of Matthew Bomer's photo by "kind request." Did PMK have anything to do with it? At least Greg Hernandez stated that Bomer was "out" apparently and "in a committed relationship." He kissed some guy and a photo was taken - unless he acknowledges to someone publicly that he's gay you should leave the photo up! Equality is never going to happen if we keep acting like being gay is a bad thing. He doesn't have to discuss his private life, just acknowledge that he's gay. Why don't you make that kind request. Best

Marcus

Ok, that's great to hear. I've heard numerous accounts of lawyers threatening bloggers, so I had to ask. ;)

Greg in Hollywood said essentially what you told me: Bower's friends nicely asked him to take it down since he's currently in a LTR.

Oh, and on the Datalounge front--man. Have you read some of the comments on his IMDB profile?

There is a thread there now that reads: "Yet another IMDb board ruined because of homosexuality"

Posters there went so far to say it's rude to even ASK if someone is gay--especially a hot celebrity these women posters apparently fancy.

The thing that frightens me is that these posters (on IMDB and elsewhere regarding this topic) is that they seem to be under the belief that they're progressive and ahead of their time yet there is nothing wrong, in their eyes, with never mentioning your gay and letting people believe that your straight when your not.

Matthew Rettenmund

Jeff: I'm on your side; Matt's not in the closet, he's out. Perhaps a cover story hasn't happened just yet, but he seems to be making no secret of being gay. If I sense otherwise, I'll put it back up. Same thing happened with me re Greg.

Me

If he is out then why won't his PR people respond? Their stance on this is "no comment"


Being out to friends and being publically out are not the same thing.

steve slack

he's sexy guy

hayley

I so wanna fuck that man.......if he were bi...i could be cool with that...could be fun ;D

just seen

Ok... I'm belive! Please send a big hug to santa, if you see him.

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