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Celebration Recalibrated

A remixed and revisited version of Celebration. 

What's Not In Store

When you get Madonna's DVD version of Celebration with all of her best videos (minus a few that really should be on there), you will notice that "Justify My Love" has been censored to block out the model's breasts. There are not two versions—naughty and nice—there is only one version: nice. This is because Walmart would not have stocked it otherwise.

In the year 2009, Walmart can not even stock a video collection with a flash of boob, but will sell Drag Me to Hell (Unrated Version)?

And they can't say it's to protect the unsuspecting consumer—anyone buying a Madonna DVD knows what's in store. It's simply to dictate to the consumer and it's to push a social agenda that was old-fashioned 80 years ago.

Unfortunately, Warner Brothers did this to all copies of Celebration—I believe this is true globally. If you wind up with a copy of this DVD with no censorship, please send details.

Not that La Ciccone will care...Madonna seems to care far less about this potentially career-defining collection than her fans do. It's one thing not to be into nostalgia, it's another not to care when your own history's being rewritten.

Justify My (Current) Love

The premium version of Celebration (distinguished by its more black-and-white cover) is up for grabs on iTunes now for $29.99. With it comes the Benny Benassi Remix of "Celebration" as well as the long-lost, never-heard tune "It's So Cool" from the American Life (!) sessions. It must have been hard coughing up something people haven't already heard with all the leaks that have occurred in the past few years. It also comes with 30 music videos.

More importantly, the "Celebration" video is (temporarily) FREE now at iTunes.

I want you, the wrong way.

My read on this is it's mostly another bullshit video, though one of her better bullshit videos, if only for that sexy dancer whose images I'll sprinkle throughout. I really love how she looks and don't get why some have objected to the (rather amazing!) Balenciaga Balmain dress, which shows off her body perfectly or even the (rather good, unlike the one from "Jump") wig. Madonna looks about 15 years younger than her age and incredibly beautiful—I think people have warped expectations of what 51 looks like if they think she looks "old" in this.

Would've been a better lead, but Jesus works.

I like some of the dancing but wish it had been more choreographed, which might have elevated this in the way simple videos like "Vogue" or "Human Nature" are not just about dancing about gaily. Instead, it's just "better than 'Give It 2 Me.'"

Open Your Vault

Madonna's official calendar sucks ass, but her Celebration DVD set is pretty  fantastic—it offers 18 of her videos that have never been released on DVD and 47 videos overall (she's only had about 55 total). The entire tracklisting of the DVD + a confirmed (and slightly modified) tracklisting for the 2CD and UPDATE for the 1CD UPDATE are after the jump.

Unreleased pic...until now.

Don't get your hopes up for that rumored director's cut of "American Life"—despite it being probably her best or at least most interesting video of the 2000s, she's still too chicken to revisit that era...

Into The Grooves

I was away in San Francisco for four days, so for the first time in years I literally didn't even look at my blog—my absence was without malice, I just needed a break. I did manage to put some stuff on auto-post while I was gone, but of course I'm behind or completely missed the boat on some news.

One old-news item I wanted to post anyway is the rumored (and seemingly real) final track listing for Madonna's Celebration, a project we care a lot more about than she does (who goes along with an album/single release while on tour and unavailable for promotion?):

Time Is Waiting For No Man

There's a unique electro "4 Minutes" remix by Lexxx that just popped up over at Hello From Lisbon that's calling you.